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Fill Your Heart with Love

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Oh, what a weekend! My heart is filled in ways that should not surprise me at this point in my life, yet here I am. Jammies on (it's only 4:45 p.m.). Hydrating. Reflecting on the Somatics Work 1 clinic that wrapped up here earlier this afternoon. Today, I did a demo for the group with my Mustangs. I brought both horses into the arena and haltered them, playing with them for a bit before everyone walked over. Becky Howell, the clinician and founder of Meeting Place Equine and I agreed that too many eyes focused on Cappy might be a bit much for him, so we decided to use Cinder for the 'observation' demo. I let Cappy back into the pasture.  Becky asked me to lead Cinder around while she pointed out different aspects on Cinder's body. Despite the windy gusts and crinkling of fall leaves spinning down (much more enrichments than a bubble machine!), I was tickled to hear comments about Cinder's symmetry, balance and connection. Moving close to the fence where the seven wo

Do Less

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Nestled snugly in familiar surroundings, I find my breath and reflect upon the last few weeks. Four unexpected days in the hospital, terrified by words like cancer, my future went hazy and filled with uncertainty. Honestly, I went to a dark place for a while sitting in Baptist Memphis ER's waiting area. I imagined my husband and loved ones left behind, mourned all the things I wanted to accomplish with my Mustangs, unfinished writing projects, and a vanishing future. Fast forward a few short weeks to today. Clean bill of health, home from an inspirational and challenging horse behavior clinic, Cappy's successful dental procedure accomplished this afternoon, and a future without limitation. Today, I cried tears of gratitude, overwhelmed as I pondered the journey that brought me to where I am now. During the final day of the Rachael Draaisma clinic, I experienced a huge 'Aha!' when I heard her guide me to do less. Calming signals (horses offer these for multitudes of reas

Welcome to my Circus!

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    SOOO many big things recently! Farrier was coming at 2:30 (he has been at least 30-45 minutes early every single time in the three years we've been working together) so I brought all 3 of my equines into the arena to play/halter to be ready for him. I still get a little anxious about keeping Cappy under threshold once his truck pulls in the drive & my mini donkey can be, well, quite a donkey about being haltered unless he's in the proper frame of mind. So, of course, my lovelies were all eager to come in and play, and halters were all on in like maybe 5 minutes. Guess who is running an hour behind schedule? Yup. Time to pivot!      Taking advantage of my new arena, we played with the rings (3 hard rubber rings linked together, a dog toy purchased for my horses) and both my Mustangs are now holding them in their mouths for a two count!       With plenty of time still to kill, we moved to the Reverse Round pen (RRP). For those unfamiliar, this is simply a circle created w

Trusting my Training

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Ever had one of those experiences that goes so beyond your wildest expectations that you can hardly believe it is happening and you drive home from 'just a trail ride' (HA! it is never 'just' anything) and can't stop grinning and you know people are driving past wondering about the goofy woman hauling her horse and you don't even care? I hope everyone feels like I do right now at least...No, as often as possible in your lives! On Monday, July 1st, 2024 Cinder and I rode our softest ride so far. Almost nine miles in the shaded hills and forests of Waterloo's trails. Since she'd done so well last week with the neck rope, I wanted to give my Two Horse Tack halter/bridle headstall a try. Originally, I'd planned on playing around in my new arena before trying this out on the trails. The best laid plans... Knowing I needed to be driving to meet Rose around 9:15AM, I fed around 7AM. All was well. I packed my waters and lunch, had the trailer ready, grabbed

Coming to Grips with 'Fair'

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Life is not fair. There are always going to be people who figure out how to work the system, find the loopholes, win without actually earning the win.  This makes me a little crazy...and not in my normal, okay if people don't appreciate my crazy, crazy.  I work really hard to achieve my goals. When I do my best, when I know I have done all I could do, and then get beat to the finish, I am okay with the result. It pushes me further in future attempts. However, when I do my best but get beat at the finish because of loopholes, rules being set aside, trickery if you will...it gnaws at me, burns a hole in my calm, wakes me as I mentally twist and turn with the unfairness of it all. Turn the other cheek. Forgive and forget. Let it go. It's what the loophole seekers, the rule benders, the tricksters are hoping for in order to continue their methods, in order to keep nudging out the ones who play by the rules, who ignore bad behavior by others, who take the infamous high road. Seeming

Savoring Stillness: Quiet

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The idea of being still. The Universe has been none too subtle in sending me this message. Stillness, not in the sense of being frozen. Quite the opposite actually. Finding peace in stillness, in not moving, allowing my heart and mind to settle, to feel, to process the feels...whoooof!  Can you do this? Truly be still, assess your mind set, and acknowledge stressors? Anyone feeling that queasiness, the need to move, to avoid?  After Robbie died, my mantra was 'Tamp it down, tamp it down, wayyyy down!' But that was then. I needed to stay busy. I needed to survive. Recovery, finding life (credit to Salman Rushdie for putting it so perfectly in his memoir, Knife) means DEALING WITH THE ISSUES I had been keeping outside my bubble.  Yikes, right? Last week, I headed to Spin to Win Horsemanship, Naomi Rutter's lovely farm in Chatham, Michigan. Cinder and I were participating in a Balance Through Movement Method clinic led by Stacia Strong. The focus (in a nutshell) was helping ea

Boundaries & Building Relationships

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I am on my phone in the midst of a heavy, emotional discussion. Sitting cross legged on my bed, my heart is exposed in the way only May is capable of these days. Grief. Boundaries. Prioritizing my needs against disappointment, expectations, and dismissiveness. Some heavy topics for a Monday morning, but important and necessary. Cleansing even. As I contemplate things with a trusted friend, I see Cappy through my bedroom patio door. He stands relaxed near the back of the west pasture. Just watching him calms me, fills my bucket if you will. My heart rate slows as I see him droop into a sigh and drop gently onto the green blanket of spring's grass. My sweet gelding lays down, comfortable enough to chill out even though Cinder is still in the center pasture after morning feeding. Red stands about twenty feet away, not on guard, simply resting. Watching this, I grace myself with acknowledging how much Cappy trusts me, how far I have helped him come since we first met. This is important